b"that. If you want to get married, you go getupon practical person. She was very aware of married, he said.the marriage penalty realities. She also had Love on the lava rocks heard the stories of people getting divorced Before they connected with the now iconicon paper because they can only have $3,000 conversation that lasted the equivalent of twoin their bank accounts, or that people lose their full workdays, Smith had completed herentirelifesavingstotakecareofmedical postdoctorate and was a faculty member atcosts no longer covered because they lost their Ferris State University, roughly 50 minutesbenets. from where Andrews was completing hisThe question becomes, do we get married? undergraduate degree. They were more thanSmith said. I just remember thinking of my 100milesapartas Andrewspursuedandmom and dad, who have been married for completed his graduate degree in earth scienceover 50 years. This could have happened to at Western Michigan University, despite his MS.them when they were married, right? The Because Smith loved baseball and had herfact that Jon was diagnosed with MS before we doctoral degree, Andrews' friends often calledgot married, it shouldn't be allowed to impact her Dr. Baseball. Andrews took that further andthat, right? That doesn't seem fair. lovingly called her Dr. Girlfriend. AndrewsIf we just had to live on my income and my was active in WMU's geology club, which madeinsurance forever, then so be it. I just knew wed annual trips to places such as the Badlandsbe okay. We will nd a way to work it out. orMountRainier.Inspring2018,theclubThis is why Ball explained it is important made its annual trip to Iceland.for people to educate themselves about and I knew I was going to propose to Melissaadvocate for methods to ensure they do not lose when I got home, but things are costly in Iceland,their health-related benets if they get married. especially nice engagement rings, so I got herHe said there are many misconceptions about a pair of lava rock earrings. Im such a nerd,what is and isn't permitted once you get married, he said. and many of these rules and regulations vary by state. He's also very much a romantic. Smith saidTo learn how to make the best decision for they drove from the airport to a nearby hotelyou and your partner's specic situations, Ball after he returned from Iceland. It was very late,said it is important to connect with local, state, and they both were extremely exhausted. and federal resources and experts familiar Hecomesoutandgetsdownononewith benets and laws regarding assistance, knee with these earrings, and he says, Woulddisabilities, and marriage. you like a promotion? she said. I have noMy best advice is to get somebody who idea what he's talking about at rst. And thenhas the expertise who will sit down with you he said, Do you want to become Dr. Fianc?to do the math and count the costs, he said. Of course she said, Yes.There are also strong communities online or Letting love guidein the community where you meet a lot of and answer the tough questions people who have been through the battles and can provide some guidance. Beinglifelong partners was the simplestAnd just in case you were curious, Andrews decision Andrews and Smith had to makeand Smith were married on June 8, 2019. about their relationship. But it was two yearsShe kept her maiden name for professional since he had been diagnosed with MS, andreasons, he recently got approved for Social already he was experiencing things such asSecurity Disability Insurance, and their wedding fatigue and weakness in his legs.reception featured a breakfast buffet, an omelet While Andrews is the romantic in theirbar, a wedding cake made of donuts, and yes, relationship, Smith is the mutually agreedsausage gravy on biscuits.31 msfocusmagazine.org"