58 msfocusmagazine.org Your caregiver needs to stay happy and healthy themselves, or they won’t be able to assist you. So do what you can to help make their lives easier. Here are ten ‘hacks’ you can try to keep the caregiving relationship strong. 1. Without thinking, we may let caregivers start doing more than they really need to do for us. Think through what you can still do for yourself, what things you could do with a few alterations to how they are done, and what things you really require help to do. 2. Don’t repeat the annoying mantra “I’m sooooo sorry,” especially pitifully and/or frequently. Show consideration, but don’t make your caregiver constantly provide reassurance. They know you are sorry to be in this situation, and so are they. “Thank you” works just fine. 3. Be sure your caregiver gets time away from caregiving responsibilities. Encourage them to go out and do things. See if you can go out with others sometimes, so they can have the house to themselves. 4. Try to do what you can to make things pleasant for them – who doesn’t appreciate delivery pizza if they usually cook? 5. Be sure that you maintain other relationships, even if it’s just by phone or Facebook, so you don’t become too dependent on your caregiver for all your social and emotional needs. 6. When possible, consolidate things you need help with, so your caregiver can have uninterrupted time to do other things, rather than constantly responding to a series of small requests for assistance. 7. Though it may be hard to accept from a parent, spouse, son, or daughter, not everyone is good at the caregiver role. If they aren’t handling things well, try to see things from their point of view, and be realistic about their abilities to be caregivers. Explore ways to get help. 8. Even the most dedicated caregivers – no, especially the most dedicated caregivers – can burn out. Watch for the signs that your caregiver needs help themselves. 9. Don’t let all of your together time become caregiving time – do something fun, even if it’s only watching a movie together. 10. Encourage them to join a caregiver support group either in the real world or online. People in similar situations can help and support each other, and may have valuable experience dealing with the same problems you are facing. While you’re at it, look for a support group for you, too. Find an MS group at msfocus.us/FindMSGroup. Life with MS MS HACKS How to Hack Your Caregiver Have You MS Hacked the Problem? Send your tips and tricks to MSHacks@msfocus.org.