b'itself or what the disease had caused, I plunged sense to everyone, but thats the thing: theinto depression. I can tell you, I began to (and things you do when suering from depressionstill do) mourn the person I was and wanted dont always make sense. I was lucky enoughto be. When I lost my job because of MS, I felt to have a friend notice and ask me about it,like I lost myself. Id spent so much of my life anddespitetheembarrassment,Inallytrying to be a certain person, trying to reach broke down and explained.goals I had set up for myself ages ago, only to This friend convinced me to get help. Shehave it all pulled out from underneath me. also helped me learn more about depressionAll of this has had a profound eect on my and the physical changes it causes. I waslife, one I still struggle with today. I often feel finally able to get over my own stigmalike I lack control and lack a future. I nd it surrounding this symptom and get the help Ihard to have things to look forward to, even needed. That doesnt mean that I dont stilldicult to nd joy at times. Ill also admit that suer from depression, but seeing a mentalI routinely think about suicide. The thing is, I health professional has helped me deal withalso do an amazing job of keeping all of this it. Similar to the way my physical therapisthidden with a smile. If you look at my social taught me to use a cane and learn strategiesmedia, youd have no idea about the demons to improve my walking, I was able to improveI struggle with. At one point, I even found solace my day-to-day life with depression. If there isin cutting, which still seems baing to me. one thing I hope you take away from this, itsIts the kind of thing you picture a teenager that mental health is an important symptomdoing, but I found myself, in my late thirties to be aware of and that you can get help. Thecutting myself. I dealt with so much nerve best way to succeed at having multiplepain, as well as feeling so out of control in my sclerosis is to have a great healthcare team.life, that in some twisted way, I felt better Its important to have not only a greatcutting myself. To me, it was nally pain that neurologist, but physical, occupational, speech,I could control. I dont expect that to make and mental health professionals as well.53 msfocusmagazine.org'